My dream left me feelings frighten and shaky. I knew it wasn’t real, yet anxiety filled my heart.
My daughter had gotten married and I had played no part it.
Not in the proposal, not in the planning. No part whatsoever.
In my dream, I was a guest in the back of the church, watching. As her favorite music began to play, my mind began to swirl. “My girl is getting married! Why am I just sitting here?” Rushing to the bride’s room, I found her. Her bridal outfit was a reflection of her unique style; completely different from anything I would have chosen.
She was fine but I was not.
When I awoke, I knew my dream was more than random. There was truth I needed to glean from.
I can be one of those moms … the ones with the built-in expectations. The one with unspoken yet idealistic dreams of what should be. Ideally, to me.
God wants me to recognize my ideals are not always the best, but His are.
Isaiah 55: 8 -9 tells us God’s thoughts and our thoughts are not always the same. But His thoughts and His ways are always higher, better than our ways and our thoughts.
Although I create in my heart and mind the perfect birthday, vacation or one-day wedding, God may have a different plan. A better plan. Maybe not perfect in the way I imagine, but perfect according to His plans and purposes.
This is especially hard as a mother. Wanting the very best for our children, we can get our heart set on the best pre-school, middle-school, high school or college. Knowing how hard it can be to make it in this world, we press in with our plans, suggesting or insisting they pursue the degree, career or marriage choice we think is best.
The problem comes when I forget the most important part of the plans: God and His ways.
Knowing the wisdom and experience we bring to our child’s life, it’s easy to forget to direct our wholehearted attention to God and His perfect wisdom for their future. Without realizing it, we hinder the process of our child learning to hear from God for themselves.
While I can say I’m growing every day when it comes to expectations, I will always be on my knees asking God to help me. It is comforting know, through the power of the Holy Spirit living in me, I can come to God daily and surrender my thoughts and plans to Him.
It’s there I can lie down my thoughts and plans for my children as well.
Maybe like me, the idea of taking a step back from directing all of your children’s ways scares you a bit. Here is where I find my comfort: my Father God is my children’s Father and He loves them even more than I do.
Let’s rest securely knowing when we encourage them to follow Him, His plan for them and their lives is so much better than ours.
Lord, teach me to pray for your best for myself, my family and those I love. Empower me to daily lay down my expectations. Then, help me to leave expectation behind and trust You are always at work, to bring Your best for Your glory. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Lynn has just released a new book: Magnetic: Becoming the Girls He Wants. Magnetic empowers young women to:
· Stop feeling powerless over your emotions and people’s opinions as you gain unshakeable confidence
· Limit the draining affect of “girl drama” so you can invest your time in becoming the best you
· Replace the agonizing frustration of wanting to be noticed and liked with a deep assurance that you already are
You can order your copy here.
- What Do You Expect? - December 17, 2015
- The Best Time to Make Up Your Mind - November 12, 2015
- Mom – Never Give Up! - October 15, 2015
