5 Reasons Why Kids Act Differently When Momma Is Around

April 29, 2013 By

 

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“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,gentleness and self-control.” Galatians 5:22-23

There she was over in the corner talking to some friends when I brought her children into the room.

I had been watching them all day so she could help her hubby with some work around the house. But it was time to take them home.

I loved spending time with her kids. They were funny, cute and occasionally a bit mischievous in the sweetest kind of way. At least most of the time.

But the minute they were within a stones throw from their momma, the drama would begin and the noise level became unbearable. Tugging, yelling, fighting, kicking, complaining and whining.

Oh…and did I mention whining? (Yeah…it was that bad!)

But what didn’t make sense was that those sweet little angelic kids had been with me for the past five hours and I almost thought I saw halos hovering above their heads…they were that good!

And then, like something from Ironman, they mutated into something so different, they were almost unrecognizable ~ even un-human.

How is that possible?

Have your kids ever done that?  

Yeah…mine have too.

So, why do our kids act differently when momma is around?

1. BECAUSE WE LOVE THEM ~ AND THEY KNOW IT… Kids who know their momma loves them are prone to pounce on the ground, lay prostrate at their momma’s feet and begin wailing like a wounded bird for no apparent reason other than the fact that we will pick them up in our arms, tuck their heads sweetly on our shoulder and console them with the reassuring love that only a momma can give. Whether they are 2 or 10, they long for those momma hugs and that momma love.

2. BECAUSE THEY TRUST THEIR MOMMA~ Kids know that no matter who may come and go in their life, and no matter who may let them down, they can always trust their momma to be there for them. They’re not looking for perfect parents, they just know that no one else will be there for them like their momma will. Mommas are a safe place for kids to be who they are at their weakest and strongest moments and they know their mom won’t love them any less. They trust their moms.

3. BECAUSE MOMS ARE MUSHY ~ So, we might as well go ahead and admit it…if our kids need a gentle word or a loving hug, they know that momma is the one to run to. Moms are mushy and whether kids just want attention, they’re going through something or they’re a young teen having a hormonal meltdown moment, they know their momma’s heart will hurt with theirs because moms are mushy.

4. BECAUSE THEY NEED US ~ When their little hearts are hurting, they don’t feel well, they’re tired, hungry or they just want some butterfly kisses and a momma hug, they need their mommas. Sometimes, they just miss their momma and haven’t developed a better way to express their feelings other than to tug at your pant leg and act as if their world has just ended. Like no other place on earth, a momma’s arms are where children feel security, comfort, contentment and love. They don’t only want their momma. They need their momma.

5. BECAUSE THEY CAN ~ Let’s face it, sometimes, we moms can become too mushy, too distracted, too disconnected or too disinterested to notice what is going on with our kids. It happens all the time. Kids try pushing every possible button momma has in order to get their way. And life often keeps us so preoccupied that our kids become desperate for our attention. So they either try to manipulate momma to get their way or to get their attention. To them, any attention is worth it. Even if it’s bad.

When our kids behave differently with us, there’s a reason, and it’s not always a bad one. It may simply be because we love them and they know it. Or because they trust us. Or because we are mushy moms. Or because they need us. Or maybe it is because they are trying to get our attention and they know that if they misbehave, they can.

WHAT ABOUT YOU, SWEET MOMS? DO YOU RECOGNIZE ANY REASONS WHY YOUR CHILDREN MIGHT ACT DIFFERENTLY WITH YOU THAN WITH OTHERS? HOW CAN YOU ASSURE THEM OF YOUR LOVE AND HELP THEM DEVELOP BETTER WAYS TO EXPRESS THEIR EMOTIONS?

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Heightened Awareness: Living Life in the Midst of the Unknown

April 19, 2013 By

Heightened Awareness Graphic 4-2013

© Angela Farley | Dreamstime Stock Photos RF-LL

Most of my life is lived in a constant state of heightened awareness. At any given moment I am painfully aware that I could have to drop everything and be in the middle of a medical crisis. Truth be told, that is pretty much true for any of us, especially moms.

Our kids are in a state of constant movement and yes, at any given time, they could get hurt. For me, it is the same, except that I have also experienced this medical crisis too many times.

In 2005 my oldest son woke up that morning for school and he just didn’t seem “right?”. I thought he might have been having a stomach ache, or maybe it could have been from the fall he had the night before from running in the house with his socks on, either way I was not prepared for how dramatically life would change in that one instant.

He went from just not “right” to full blown grand mal seizures and continued seizing for forty five minutes. He was eleven years old at the time and in the middle of that my then nine year old walked in and witnessed every single minute of it. The ambulance came and next thing I knew my boy was on a helicopter headed to the children’s hospital…without me.

We had no idea what was going on or that from that moment on our lives would be in a constant state of heightened awareness. He spent fifty one days in the PICU of the children’s hospital and after several procedures, infections, complications, and more he walked out of the hospital with a new side effect of the trauma his body went through, he would be forever insulin dependent and was now diabetic. We had the best doctors, training and more and had walked the road of juvenile diabetes for almost four years when he started having seizures again.

Just when things started to fall into a new normal the walls of our lives were rattled and here we were in a new state of heightened awareness.

Never knowing what was going on in his world, every phone call, text, or communication with our son started with “are you ok?” and then we could process whatever he was talking about and move on.

Years of doctors appointments, tests, blood work, referrals and more added to the stress, anxiety and worry. Living in this constant state of awareness and always being ready to jump into action is exhausting–not just mentally, but physically and emotionally as well.

We are eight years on this journey now and we have learned a lot of lessons through this, but something keeps banging up against my heart whenever I start to feel the anxiousness of the heightened awareness and that is this — what if we were to “shift” (my one word for 2013) our thoughts and awareness from the issue and put it squarely where it belongs…on God.

Moving the focus from the stuff going on in our lives (and let’s face it, we all have stuff) and resting it on the only One that can do anything about it. To have His peace, comfort and rest would be a blessed reprieve for most of us right now.

Hang with me here, if we lived in a state of heightened awareness of God, then imagine with me how you might feel emotionally? physically? emotionally?

For I am always aware of your unfailing love,

   and I have lived according to your truth.

Psalm 26:3 NLT

Sweet friends, I know it isn’t always easy to make that shift, believe me, it is still something that I wrestle with almost daily, but this I know — He is in control (Hebrews 2:8). He has a perfect plan for your life (Jeremiah 29:11), for your family and He wants nothing more than to shower you with His love (Romans 5:5).

What does living in a state of heightened awareness of God look like?

It can be anything as simple as;

  1. starting your day with a “Good Morning God”,

  2. to stopping in the middle of a busy day to say “thank you” for the sunshine, the children in your life, or for any of the blessings you’ve been given that day.

  3. or even listening to worship music and being fully present in that moment to enjoy it.

I don’t know what it looks like for you, but I do know this, the peace from shifting my heightened awareness from the health issues to God and who He is, has brought me so much more comfort in living life in the midst of the unknown.

Yes, like any mama bear that has a child (well, he’s an adult now, but he’s still my boy) with health issues I am painfully aware that things can change in an instant, but I have peace that no matter what happens my God will carry me through and that is more than enough for me right this very moment.

What about you?

When living in the state of heightened awareness which are you looking for that peace and comfort in the most — physically, mentally or emotionally?

How would living in your day to day world change if you made that shift and were in a state of heightened awareness to the presence of God?

I look forward to hearing from you…

Seeking JOY on the Journey,

Melissa Mashburn

www.MelissaMashburn.net

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If Birthdays Make You Sentimental

February 26, 2013 By

Blowing CandlesI’ve discovered a crazy thing about kids. They just keep growing up.

Today I’m baking brownies for my firstborn’s sixth birthday treat. Next week, baby sister turns three. I call this “birthday season” in our family, and every year it melts my heart to a nostalgic puddle.

To me, birthdays aren’t just childhood milestones. They’re a chance to shout, “Yay, God!” for creating each daughter unique, beautiful, and according to his perfect plan. More than that, I celebrate my girls’ birthdays as a type of anniversary for me—(1) the day I entered motherhood, clueless, bidding a shocking farewell to my old friends Sleep and Dangly Earrings; and (2) the day my heart busted at the seams to welcome baby #2 with first-round love and, frankly, still a few remnants of cluelessness.

Six years may not be much in the course of a lifetime. But in this span I’ve seen a seven-pound wrinkled bundle transform into a lanky, ponytailed kindergartener who reads chapter books and chomps bubble gum. Six years is a lifetime for her. Six years flew by without permission. Six years stood painfully still.

Soon, six years will be just a memory.

And that’s what slays me. My girls—who they are today, those precious faces, those sweet giggly voices and petite sticky palms clutching my fingers—are not who they will be tomorrow. They’re always growing, always changing. Always slipping away.

Last week, we made a birthday poster for my daughter’s school. The teacher asked us to glue a baby picture beside a current photo. When I compared the two faces, tears stung my eyes. I studied those rosy baby cheeks and thought, I’ll never get that little person back. She is someone different now. Someone even more delightful, more beloved with each passing season, yes. But a private space in my heart aches when I realize all of her earlier days are just snapshots en route to graduation.

Holding Daisies It’s tempting to wish I could suspend time, to ensure my daughters will always love me unconditionally like they do today, always sing to Jesus with innocent faith, and always hold the promise of an unblemished future as they do right now, this moment.

But then I cruise through Proverbs and remember—that’s not the point of parenting.

“Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it,” (Proverbs 22:6).

I know this verse. It’s a staple in my arsenal of encouragement. Yet when was the last time I really unpacked it?

Train a child. My Bible notes say another word for “train” here is “start.” Start a child in the way he should go. Eighteen years in my house are just a launch pad. The ultimate purpose of parenting is to equip, teach, love—then let the children go. Is anybody else weepy just thinking about that?

When he is old. Only God knows how many days we have on Earth, but chances are my babies won’t just grow out of their kindergarten shoes—they’ll grow old. Which means they’ll build their own families and establish their own legacies, founded largely on the start that my husband and I gave them. That is a huge responsibility for a parent. But it’s also a tremendous privilege.

He will not turn from it. The truth is, my children aren’t the only people growing up. So am I. I’m not the same person I was six years ago, either. But isn’t that the beauty of the Christian life? There is a way we should go, which suggests forward movement, drawing nearer to God. I want that for my kids as much as I want it for myself.

So today, I’ll embrace the bubble gum stage and look forward to tomorrow, for the chance to see more of who God designed my girls to become. I can already tell there are some benefits to parenting older children. Dangly Earrings are back in my life. Sleep and I are still estranged. But that is a post for another time.

Happy birthday, my darling girls. Happy anniversary to me. And thank you, Lord, for the great gift of being a mom.

By Becky Kopitzke

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Who’s Your First Love? And Monday LINK UP!

February 11, 2013 By


Before we begin today’s post, we want to announce the winner of yesterday’s giveaway that Julie Gillies is so graciously providing. PAMELA GRADY, you are the winner! Congratulations!

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True Love Heart

February is the month of love and romance. Red and pink hearts are everywhere in honor of Valentine’s Day—the universal day for showing and sharing love. Of course, we don’t just love in the month of February—or one day a year—but it is the day we focus on finding ways to demonstrate our love.

Little children certainly don’t limit their display of love to just one day! Whenever my grandkids come to visit, they leave me love notes with their sweet heart drawings all over the house and on my white board. And at home they do the same for mommy and daddy. They seem to have an abundance of love and they don’t mind telling the world about it!

Brandon's love note

Fill in the blank with the first thing that comes to your mind: I LOVE_________

 Love is a word we often use loosely and it can take on many different meanings….

  • I love pizza!
  • I love pink!
  • I love my husband!
  • I love my kids!
  • I love my new vacuum!
  • I love Trader Joe’s!

I think you get the idea. Obviously we love our husbands and kids more than we love pizza. So how would you fill in the following blank?

My FIRST love is _____________.

You might have had trouble completing that sentence. If you’re married, how could you possibly differentiate between your husband and your children as your first love? If you have more than one child . . . how could you determine which one of them you love first? You can’t. But when you fill in that blank with…My FIRST love is Jesus . . . He gives you the ability to have limitless love for Him and for others:

Jesus said, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your passion and prayer and intelligence.’ This is the most important, the first on any list. But there is a second to set alongside it: ‘Love others as well as you love yourself.’ These two commands are pegs; everything in God’s Law and the Prophets hangs from them.”—Matthew 22:37-40 The Message

You probably know people who would fill in the blank with …

  • My FIRST love is myself.
  • My FIRST love is my career.
  • My FIRST love is fame and fortune.
  • My FIRST love is my car or house or bank account…..

Every day we see on the news or in our neighborhoods, the tragic results of lives lived with the wrong priorities.

Analogy: Earthy Love and Love for Jesus

I once read a satirical advice column:  Dear Dr. Lovelorn, Where do I go to find a lukewarm love for the rest of my life to grow old with?

Of course, none of us ever plan for our romantic love to turn lukewarm. Remember when you were first in love: when time, money, and energy were never a concern. You talked lovingly about each other nonstop, couldn’t stand to be apart, showered each other with affection, and wanted the whole world to know you were in love.

Then when you marry and children join your happy family, it becomes harder and harder to find the time, money, and energy to expend on each other. Yes, your love has matured, but you have to be careful that mature love doesn’t mean the passion and excitement has turned to lukewarm and routine. Even God wants our marriages to stay as on fire, as when we were first in love….

“Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you.
Rejoice in the wife of your youth” (Proverbs 18-18 NLT)

God also wants us to maintain the passion and excitement we had when we first fell in love with His Son, Jesus. Have you been around a new believer lately? They have a radiance and glow…just like a new bride. New believers are on fire for the Lord and there’s a joy and exuberance about them that’s contagious and often leads others to want to know where this new found joy came from.

But as we spiritually mature, we may become like the church in Ephesus who Jesus spoke of in Revelations 2:4-5 (NIV): “Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love.  Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place.”

Removing the lampstand meant they would no longer be an effective church . . . effective Christian witness . . . effective role model to the next generation.

Only when we place Jesus first in our life and heart, can we love others with a genuine Christ-like love. It’s His love that fuels us to be better wives and mothers and grandmothers. . . . women. Jesus helps us do things for our families lovingly, not dutifully. There’s a difference between preparing a delicious meal because we love our family, versus throwing something together just to get them fed.

How Do We Return To Our First Love?

Just like we have to make an effort to rekindle the romantic fire in our marriages, we occasionally have to reignite the fire for Jesus in our hearts! Here’s an acrostic for L O V E that works for me, and I know it will work for you too:

Linger with Him!

“Oh, how I love your instructions!  I think about them all day long.”—Psalm 119:97 NLT

Find ways to have a quiet time with the Lord every day. I know that’s not always easy if you have small children; but take a tip from Susanna Wesley, the mother of John and Charles Wesley, the founders of the Methodist movementSusanna Wesley. Susanna had 19 pregnancies, and 10 of her children lived past the age of two. That in itself requires great faith, but even with 10 children running around, Susanna believed strongly in daily prayer and if she couldn’t find a private place in the house to pray, she put her apron over her head as a sign to the children to be extra quiet, mom was praying!

 

 

 

Find that private place in your home where you can “throw your apron over your head” and help yoMother Daughter prayingur children learn to respect your time of prayer and reading your Bible. This will teach them more about the value of prayer than any Bible study. My daughter has three children 4, 7, 8 and she just read the Bible in a year on her phone by using YouVersion.

cell phone

 Obsess Over Him!

“I will praise the Lord at all times.  I will constantly speak his praises. I will boast only in the Lord; let all who are helpless take heart. Come, let us tell of the Lord’s greatness; let us exalt his name together.”—Psalm 34:1-3 NLT

The dictionary describes obsession as:

  • Preoccupied
  • Dominated
  • Fixed
  • Immersed in
  • Gripped by
  • An Infatuation
  • A Passion

AH…that we would all be deliriously, madly, and obsessively in love with Jesus!

Value Him!

“Let the whole earth sing to the Lord! Each day proclaim the good news that he saves. Publish his glorious deeds among the nations. Tell everyone about the amazing things he does.  Great is the Lord! He is most worthy of praise! He is to be feared above all gods.”—1 Chronicles 16:23-25

Synonyms for value:

  • Worthy
  • Worship
  • Love

We can tell what we value most by looking at our checkbooks and our calendar. Where do you spend most of your money and time? Ask yourself if it has Kingdom value.

Enjoy Him!

I was filled with delight day after day, rejoicing always in his presence.—Proverbs 8:30 NIV

Happy In the Lord

When we L O V E Jesus Christ with total abandonment, our hearts begin to change and we’re able to reach out with His love to those around us and L O V E them as Jesus commanded:

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”—John 13:34-35 NIV.

 

Share with us ways you’ve found to keep Jesus first in your life and how you L-inger with O-bsess over V-alue and E-njoy Him!

Have a Happy Jesus is “My First Love” Day!

PS: You might also find it helpful to do my Bible study Face-to-Face with Priscilla and Aquila: Balancing Life and Ministry.

To learn more about Janet Thompson’s Woman to Woman Mentoring and About His Work Ministries please visit her website.

 

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A Christmas Gift for Daddy

December 23, 2012 By

It’s too late.  If you haven’t finished Christmas shopping for your husband, your time is up. Oh, you could fight the crowds, pray for a parking spot, wait in line, and buy him … a bag of jerky, but that’s not really what he wants.

On Christmas day, a mom can give her main man what he wants most:  her respect. Christmas can become so focused on the children that a dad can feel like a toy dancing Santa … fun at first, but then only good to be put in a corner and ignored. Add in some holiday-inspired sarcasm from the love of his life, and he might feel like he belongs on the Island of Misfit Toys. Isle of Misfit Toys-001

Moms long to make the holidays magical and meaningful, the crowning glory of the family year. If an enthusiastic mama isn’t careful, she may be so wrapped up in adding a “crown” to the family scrapbook that she fails to be the crown of her husband.

“An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones” (Proverbs 12:4).

When mom respects dad, children follow.

A dad has the potential to simply become the last one out of bed, the guy who bags up the wrapping paper, the one who lights the fire, or the one who reads the verses.  But he has the potential to be treated as so much more than that, and he should be.

  • Train your children to “thank Daddy” for their gifts, so they see the earthly expression of James 1:17.
  • Serve Daddy first at your holiday meal, to honor him; engage your kids in serving him, too.
  • Verbalize what’s in your heart, and let your kids hear: “I love to hear Daddy read the Christmas story.”
  • Whatever your abundance, affirm your man with words: “Thank you for working so hard for our family.”
  • Resist being preoccupied with preparations; stop and touch your man with a lingering hug or a kiss.

If we will give our husbands the gift of respect on Christmas day, our children will follow.

So there. You don’t have to fight that crowd, parallel park, or decide between Teriyaki or Spicy Buffalo jerky.  You already have what will fill the heart of your husband with comfort and joy!

Is there a time in your Christmas day when your husband “shines?”

Now it’s time to LINK UP & join the fun, meet new friends & make your message more available to others!

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Let’s hear it FROM Mom!

November 20, 2012 By

It was a three mile run, shoulder to shoulder with hopefuls like me, tasting the dust of the course in my mouth, mentally counting the time and distance. By the time it was over, I was exhausted. Was I a runner?

Runner with fansI wasn’t even in the race! I was a mom cheering on the sidelines.

Being a mom who cheers

Motivated by a full heart, moms clap at music recitals, admire primitive artwork, freeze on soccer fields, and keep the stop watch at the track. No one better cheers better than a mom.

Being a mom who hurts

But not all moms. Sometimes above the chatter at the finish line, a voice of disappointment and degradation is heard.  I heard them this season. Sometimes a mom doesn’t have the “teaching of kindness” on her tongue (Prov. 31: 26) and fails to “open her mouth in wisdom.” Instead, she lashes out with toxic words of her own embarrassment. Her child discovers the painful truth that Mom wasn’t really cheering for him at all.

Jacob ran past my place on the sideline as I strained to be heard above the crowd, “You can pull ahead, Jake. Run hard!” A few steps away down the line, an opposing fan shouted straight at my son, “Jake, there’s NO WAY you can pull ahead!” Our children need to hear more of our words of blessing to outweigh the words of attack they will hear.

After the race, he admitted that he heard us both, but I like to think my voice was the one that resonated as he ran on and gave the race his all.

Why moms need to cheer

There will be enemies all along the sidelines of life to taunt our children, to shout messages of defeat, to cry out opposition.

Every child longs to hear his mom cheer, because she has the capacity to cheer like no other, to inspire him to press on and be his greatest. After all, God designed mothers to be a source of comfort to their young, to deliver His love through her arms, gaze, and words. Let’s hear it FROM mom, because her cheers are packed with power!

To hear words of accusation, charges of inadequacy, and complaints from a mother’s voice is to cut a child to the quick.

The Psalmist describes his quieted spirit like “a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me” (Psalm 131:2).

God compares Himself as Comforter to a mother-comforter, “As one whom his mother comforts, so I will comfort you …” (Isaiah 6:13).

When a child turns his eyes and strains his ears, hoping for reassurance in the midst of life’s challenges, God wants a mother to respond as the comforter He created her to be.

  • What does your child hear you saying from the sidelines of his sport?
  • What does your child hear you saying from the sidelines of his life?
  • If you’ve been a mom with words that hurt, will you start to change that today?
  • Are you thankful for a mother or a mentor in your life who cheered you on?

By Julie Sanders from Come Have a Peace

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Time To Breathe

October 19, 2012 By

When the walls are closing in, what do you do?

Photo © Steven Errico / Getty Image

 

What a week.  I was so tired!  The days seem to be getting longer even though they were really getting shorter.  The kids were not getting along.  It seemed like no one would do their school work without being told a gazillion times.

Breathe.

My 18 year old daughter informed she had to babysit all day for someone so I wouldn’t have her around to help.

Breathe

I forgot the wet clothes were still in the washer and the dishwasher still had dirty dishes in it because I forgot to start it, again.

Breathe.

My 19 year old son sent me a text that he got another speeding ticket on the way to work.

Breathe.

The baby was taking short naps instead of his normal long naps and wanted to nurse every 30 minutes (at least that is what it felt like) and to top it off, there was nothing quick and easy to make for dinner!

Breathe.

 Remembering to breathe sounds so simple, yet when I have days like this I feel out of breath.  I run from one thing to the next stressing over not getting anything done or over what I cannot control (like my sons’ speeding ticket)

What do you do when you have a day like this?

Time to Refocus

On my super crazy days, when my now older kids were much younger, I would pile the kids into my suburban and go for a ride.  We drove around for about an hour, not going anywhere special, just driving.  The younger kids would take a nap and the older kids would play games like “I Spy” while I would talk to God about my crazy life.  When we got home things always seemed a little easier to manage and I could make it the rest of the day until Scott came home from work.

Now they are older and I can leave them in charge of the little ones and give myself some down time.

Most often I would take a walk around our neighborhood rather than waste gas driving around.  But, stepping out of the house for a bit would help me refocus. It helps me to be able to catch my breath and have a chance to think about what all is going on to make me feel so crazy.

If getting out of the house was not an option I would change up our daily routine.  I would pop some popcorn, throw a blanket on the Living Room floor and stick in a movie…in the middle of the day!  This was really shaking it up for me, because I had a set routine for naps, school, meals…everything and I rarely budged from it.  With a house full of small kids, this was how I survived. While they watched the movie I would take time to breathe.

Time to Readjust 

Sometimes there is something in my schedule that is adding stress to my day that I can either get rid of or just move to another part of my day.

I am the worst at trying to fit too much into one day.  I am determined to finish all the laundry, scrub the floors, bathe the dog and get caught up on grading papers for school, in addition to cooking the meals and watching the kids.  Who do I think I am…Super Mom?

After a careful look at your schedule, you can almost always find something that will fit better on another day or can be moved to a less stressful part of your day. It really comes down choosing the important stuff over the urgent stuff.

Time to Relax

I know telling a mom to relax is like telling her to stop being a mom.  But not only is it important, but it is necessary.  Your body needs that time, your mind needs it also.  Relaxing may look different for you than it does for me.   Sometimes I take a walk.  Sometimes I lie down and do absolutely nothing.  I highly recommend at least 10 minutes of “doing nothing” every day.  Clear your mind of your to do list and fill it with the promises of God to give you rest.  It works!  His Word never returns void and will always minister to your tired soul and mind.

photo: www.imagebase.davidniblack.com

Time to Breathe

Here are a few of my favorite scriptures to meditate on when it is time to breathe.

Psalm 131:1-2

“O LORD, my heart is not lifted up; my eyes are not raised too high; I do not occupy myself with things too great and too marvelous for me. But I have calmed and quieted my soul like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child is my soul within me.” (ESV)

 Psalm 116:7

“Return, O my soul, to your rest;  for the Lord has dealt bountifully with you.” (ESV)

Psalm 73:28

“But for me it is good to be near God; I have made the Lord God my refuge, that I may tell of all your works.”(ESV)

Ephesians 3:19-21

“And to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” (ESV)

Lamentations 3:22-26

“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.“The Lord is my portion,” says my soul, “therefore I will hope in him.”The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him. It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.”(ESV)

 

I would love to know how other moms deal with crazy days.  Leave me a comment and share your take on this subject.

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Child with No Promise

October 17, 2012 By

The winner of Parenting from the Overflow by Teri Lynne Underwood are:

Christine DeSanti and Katy Carris

“Child with no promise,” was scribbled atop the orphanage file.  Born in Eastern Europe. Unwanted. Abandoned. Downs Syndrome.  Locked unnoticed behind a remote orphanage gate with no hope of release.

Meanwhile, a content family of four was flourishing on the other side of the world.  Their sole desire was to serve the Lord in anyway possible.

Then, El Roi, our mighty God Who Sees, the Father to the fatherless, who places the lonely in families; His mighty plan of redemption began to unfold….

Vashti Walters was scanning through Reece’s Rainbow on Facebook when she saw this picture with these words written underneath, “Dillon will be institutionalized soon if he is not adopted. Are you his forever family?”

 

 

 

 

Vashti’s heart melted at the thought of this little boy. It was love at first sight.  Her husband and two children were smitten as well. God was calling and the Walters family heeded the call.  This began their 7-month journey to James (his given name).

The body of Christ surrounded the Walter family with donations of time and money.   Prayers of the saints were lifted continually to bring this special boy into the arms of his forever family. God was faithful and James became the first child adopted from Russia with Down Syndrome.

Our Journey to James (YouTube video) - View this precious video of their journey.

“James is here to light up the world…like a bottle rocket!”

“I wish EVERY family could experience the blessings adoption brings.”

“A child with no promise is FLOURSHING in a family!”

“Just a moment in eternity. But it is eternal.”   -Vashti Walters

“This is the Lord’s doing, and it is marvelous in our eyes!” Psalms 118:23

How can you join in God’s exciting work to minister to orphans?

  • There are many families willing to adopt, but unable to because of finances. Consider donating to Reece’s Rainbow and be a real part of helping these kids get home. (Great Christmas gift idea!)
  • Become a local foster parent.
  • Pray that God will use you and your family to reach the orphans here or around the globe.
  • Support other foster/adoptive families by giving financially (gas/grocery card) or helping with your time.  A date night for the parents or babysitting for doctor appointments is a great blessing!
  • Consider starting a support group at your church for families that foster or adopt.

“Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these, even the least of them, you did it to Me.” Matthew 25:4

Has the Lord led you to adopt? Come share your story and encourage others with your journey!

By Tara Dovenbarger, connect with me on Facebook!

We’re linked up with:

This Really Got Me Link-up at Rethinking My Thinking
a Rafflecopter giveaway

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Teacher Trouble & Day 5 Giveaways

August 10, 2012 By

Today’s Great Giveaways!

The Plan A MOM in a Plan B World By Debbie Taylor Williams

Do you ever feel like throwing your hands in the air and saying, “I can’t do this”?  Being a mom is hard and life is filled with Plan Bs.  Whether your Plan B is a strong willed child, a rebellious teen, being a single mom, a chronically ill child, or a tot’s tantrums, God doesn’t want you to live in Plan B despair.  Join Debbie, mom to two adult children and Mimi to three grandchildren, as she walks you through 18 parenting land mines and shows you how to defuse each one.

Completely Loved: Recognizing God’s Passionate Pursuit of Us By: Shannon Ehtridge 

In each brief reading, best-selling author Shannon Ethridge leads you to consider Old Testament stories in a new light to learn how God interacts with His people and what that reveals about His character. Most important, as you discover more about God’s true nature, you’ll begin to recognize the ways He daily touches your life and draws you closer into His loving embrace.

 To Save a Life: Dare to Make Your Life Count By: Todd Hafer and Vicki Kuyper

At some point, everyone has to decide: What’s my life going to be about? Is it about partying? Or having fun? Or just surviving another day? Or is it about living a life of significance and making a real difference in your world? This inspiring book will challenge you and show you: *How to develop friendships that really matter *The ripple effect your life can have on others *How real happiness comes from giving instead of receiving and how to help hurting teens

 HOW TO ENTER: SUBSCRIBE TO WEBSITE, COMMENT ON BLOG, SHARE FB POSTS, TWEET, RETWEET & COMMENT ON BLOG (NEW SUBSCRIBERS WILL RECEIVE OUR NEW BOOK, “FACING OUR FEARS – 31 STORIES FROM M.O.M.”)

Teacher Trouble

Timken Roller Bearing Co., calendar, September 1950, teacher at desk

School hasn’t even started yet, but we’ve had teacher trouble. I thought I was doing a good thing by sending my high school senior daughter in by herself to handle a schedule question. But when she got home, she told a tale of being eaten alive by a not-so-morning-person school counselor. Mopping up her tears, I listened and tried to retract my mama bear claws that wanted to pop out. I don’t want teacher trouble!

With the years of a senior in high school behind us, there have been moments when I did not handle teacher trouble well. We’ve schooled at public, private,co-op and home. Teacher trouble is not bound to traditional classrooms. God forgive me for opportunities lost, when my inner mama bear came out of her summer slumber and attacked the teacher’s picnic basket.

This week I applied some of my hard won lessons learned, and I’m counting it a victory for back to school moms everywhere! With God’s help, here’s what went right this time:

15 Steps for Teacher Trouble

  1. I listened to my student, but resisted stoking the flame of her temper or revealing mine.
  2. I held my tongue. This is the key, but sometimes so hard …
  3. I prayed and waited long enough to let the Lord steer my thoughts and remind me of the big picture of training up my child and representing Him to the world.
  4. I told my sister what happened and asked for her advice and prayer; she gave both. Grateful.
  5. I called the school and scheduled a same day appointment convenient for the counselor, not discussing the issue on the phone.
  6. I dressed nicely. ;)
  7. I went by myself, while my daughter took care of other school details.
  8. I made the decision to take a deep breath, smile, and ask her (the counselor/teacher) how her summer was. I tried to be like Jesus, even though I battled feel more like … well, you know. ;)
  9. I asked her first if she could describe her take on their meeting that morning; I just listened until she was done.
  10. I agreed with everything I could and affirmed where we were on the same page.
  11. I (Really the Lord held my tongue for me!) talked quietly, slowly, and leaned back in my chair … to LOOK relaxed.
  12. I told her I knew we both want the best for my student, and I appreciated her time and assistance.
  13. I thanked her for being approachable and listening, and I really meant it.
  14. I sent my student back in alone and didn’t get up and bust into the room when the counselor closed the door. I left my sweet girl “in there” to grow up a little with the Lord at her side.
  15. I told my daughter that God took care of things and it feels good to solve problems His way.

Score one for mom this year, because I’ve made some mistakes through the years … as a teacher and as a parent. I hope it’s our last teacher trouble … but it’s a new year.

I’m afraid some of you reading this will have a little teacher trouble in your course schedule for the year.  Are you prepared? I’ve learned that “When there are many words, transgression is unavoidable, But he who restrains his lips is wise” (Prov. 10:19).  God’s ways are especially good when a new school year begins and you’re a mama bear.

What have you learned about dealing w/ “teacher trouble” in your life?

A mom’s teacher trouble prayer ~

Lord, help me to trust you with my kids and their schooling this year. I need your help to know when to be their advocate and when to release them. Hold my tongue when I would spew out fast and angry words, and teach me how to be the model of resolving problems that my children need me to be. Show me how to bless other adults in my child’s life, the terrific ones and the troubling ones. Remind me to show them the grace you’ve shown me. Be the Teacher of my heart as a new school year begins.

By Julie Sanders of Come Have a Peace

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I Have Hope

July 6, 2012 By

“My soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,  for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:21-23

It was quiet, too quiet.  All the rush of people in and out of the room the days before had all come to an end. The darkness, even the newborn bed that was made specifically to be lit up and warm was completely dark and still.

My eyes went back to the unlit lamp over my son’s newborn warming bed as a new rush of pain and despair of what would be happening soon rolled through me. My beautiful newborn son, Isaac, whom I was so proud of, was delivered stillborn just hours before. 

This was the day that I would have to let my son go, force myself to walk out of this room, never to be able to hold his tiny two pound body or see his beautiful face in this life again.

My husband and I were not surprised or in shock; in fact we had been planning on this day for three months.  Doctors said our son had Trisomy 18, and we needed to abort and go on with life.  We said no, we would let God decide the number of our son’s days and carry him safe in my womb as long as we could.

During the long months of waiting you can bet I had a lot of questions for the Lord.  One of the biggest was, “Lord, this is my son, my child. You are asking me to let him go.  Will you be there to give me strength to walk away? To say goodbye?  To open my arms and physically let him go?” My Lord had proven Himself to be faithful in hard trials before, but what about this time?  I desperately wanted to know-Would He give me the strength I needed to leave the  hospital without my son?

And here I was, waking up to that dreaded, much anticipated day.

After twelve hours of labor, our family savored each minute we had holding Isaac.  We were able to rock him, take wonderful pictures of him, dress him.  I tried to memorize every detail about him.  I remember washing his face with my tears. He was so perfect. He had lots of black hair like his big brother David, long eyelashes, fuzzy eyebrows, the cutest little lips, fisted Trisomy hands, chubby cheeks, long Thompson feet!

Then it was time. I had to leave the hospital. And yes, God was there.

God’s mercy and peace flowed through the room as a sweet nurse I had never seen before walked in.  Before I handed her my precious tiny bundle, she naturally turned around and respectfully washed her hands.  I handed her my son and she smiled gently down at him.  She settled down in the rocking chair and rocked him slowly.  She assured us she would care for him and not leave him until the funeral home came.  

The love and protection that poured out of this stranger gave us the strength to walk away in peace. I will forever carry the sweet memory of my Isaac being held, respected, loved, cared for. I know this stranger was a gift to me from God, given to me at just the right time and moment. What a perfect picture of Christ’s love for each of us.

“Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet God’s unfailing love for you will not be shaken or His covenant of peace be removed,” says the LORD, who has compassion on you. Isaiah 54:10

In this life we WILL have sorrow and troubles, but His compassion for each of his children will never fail.  Great is Your faithfulness!

Dear mom, “May our Lord Jesus Christ Himself and God our Father, who loved us and by His grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your heart and strengthen you ” today! 2 Thess.2:16-17

✿How has God shown up in a tangible way to meet your greatest need? Are you daily asking to be used by God in mighty ways?✿

✘To read more about our journey, please visit   http://isaacalmon.blogspot.com✘

❥ Tara Dovenbarger

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