9 Ways to Raise a Rebellious Kid

Fact: Kids love to push the limits.  Fact: Rebellion is a human condition.  Yet there are things we do as parents that encourage the growth and intensity of a rebellious heart. Here are 9  ways to fan the flames of rebellion. Expect perfection: Performance based parenting focuses on the outside observables  rather than internal  notables. Notice outcomes but focus on developing your child’s character. Rather than only commentating on appearance or performance, “You look so beautiful” say, “Thanks for helping your sister today. You have such a kind heart.”  Punish for every infraction: Instead start saying what you want. When the child messes up, retrain. Next move to a natural consequence, …

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9 Ways to Create a Rebellious Heart in Your Child

Being an uber-controlling parent may give us the illusion that our children are towing the line, but what it actually does is create a rebellious heart in our kids. Here are 9 sure fire ways to create a rebellious heart in your kid: 9 sure fire ways to create a rebellious heart in your kid @themominitiativ @loriwildenberg Click To Tweet 1. Expect perfection: Performance based parenting focuses on the outside notables rather than internal observables. Notice outcomes but focus on developing your child’s character. Rather than only commentating on appearance or performance,”You look so beautiful” say, “Thanks for helping your …

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Talking Back Child's Heart

A Child’s Heart and the Hidden Treasure of Talking Back

“Don’t you talk back to me,” my mother said to me.  “Don’t you talk back to me,” I said to my children. “Don’t talk back,” I bet you’ve said to your kiddos too. Every mom wonders what to do about talking back. Every mom knows what talking back looks like and sounds like. We move quickly to squash it in toddlers and teens. End it. Redirect it. But in my efforts to stop it, most of the time I missed the hidden treasure. The good God intended to come from the evil. Talking back may be a mom’s best opportunity. …

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If It Could Make a Difference, Would You?

 If something could make a positive difference in YOUR life and your CHILD’s, would you do it?   Most of us would answer, “YES! What is it?” First, we need to be reminded that what comes out of our kid’s mouths and what they do, comes out of what’s in their heads and hearts. SAME FOR US. If we don’t want our kids to hit, be rude, or lie, then they need to have God’s word WITHIN THEM to redirect their natural tendencies.  SAME FOR US. Our yelling, “Stop hitting! Share! Be nice!” can bounce off a child. Of course, we must teach them to …

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Bait and Switch: How to Drop Your Gloves When Your Kids are Challenging You to a Fight

Kids seem born with an innate knowledge of how to push their mommies’ buttons. Especially when teenagers or kids of any age know they are wrong, they take pleasure in seeing just how many buttons it takes to send mom over the deep end. And when we put on the gloves and enter the ring with them it may feel good for a little, but in the end we all lose. We not only lose our cool, but we lose a teaching moment. We lose the opportunity to show an example of how adults ought handle difficult people and situations. …

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Respect Police Officers

How to Teach Kids to Respect Police Officers

A lot of us learned about people in our neighborhood from Mr. Rogers. Fred Rogers used to say one of his life lessons came from his mom. “When you see something scary,” she said, “Look for the helpers.” Maybe that lesson inspired the character of Officer Clemmons, a black man who grew up in the 60’s and struggled with his own view of police officers. He turned his own real hardships into a force for good in the lives of children, becoming one of the “human helpers” on Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood. In our kids’ world, it’s more challenging to look …

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Dear Woman Who Witnessed My Child's Meltdown - There are a few things you should know... Read more from The Mom Initiative and Lindsey Bell

Dear Woman Who Witnessed My Child’s Meltdown

I was shopping not too long ago when my son had a major meltdown. MAJOR! After receiving a few looks and hearing one unkind comment about my child’s meltdown, I decided a post was in order. Dear woman who witnessed my child’s meltdown, I know how bad that meltdown must have looked. Believe me. I know. (I was there too, remember?) While he was screaming and throwing himself around on the floor, I know it didn’t reflect well on my ability to parent. I know he was loud. I know he was bothering those who were around us. I know …

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The Cutting Truth

Cutting has become a behavior kids use because it is easily accessed, quickly achieved, and not uncommon. In fact it has become almost acceptable in the tween and teen world. The directive,“Cut it out!” is being taken literally by some kids. Cutting seems to be catchy. Lots of tween and teen girls and even some boys are doing it. What is cutting? Cutting is a self-destructive behavior where a person cuts into her skin intentionally, many times or even one time. Razors, knives, scissors, pins, and the side of a can of soda-pop are the most common weapons used to …

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My Kid is Orlando

My kid is Orlando.  My kid is Orlando. @themominitiativ @loriwildenberg Click To Tweet My young adult daughter has gone to clubs like Pulse.  One of my kids was a student at Columbine (post tragedy). We attend church, go to the movies, and school. All places that seem safe–places for fun, for education, for worship. All places where senseless heartache, terrorism, and tragedy have occurred. My daughter is a self-proclaimed lesbian. (I prefer to say she is same-sex-attracted because I don’t think people should be identified by their sexuality. I believe identity is in Christ but that is a conversation for …

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Tips for Teaching Kids Manners by Penelope Carlevato

Today, I invited my good friend and fellow author and speaker and lover of all things tea related, Penelope Carlevato, to share with us some tips on teaching our children and grandchildren manners and etiquette–not something we hear much about today. I gave my grandchildren Penelope’s book First Class Etiquette and it was quite enlightening for them. Born in England, Penelope was raised in an English home on the plains of South Dakota. Her English mother loved to have friends and family in for tea. Penelope grew up with an apron tied around her waist and continued the tradition of …

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