I had to let him go. I didn’t want to, but I had to. I had more I wanted to teach him. Time to spend with him. But it was time. Jordan, my first born child was moving out to set up his own home at his own condo. A high rise. 9th floor, overlooking parts of the Orlando city sky scape.
He’s so excited, he’s about to burst.
I’m so sad, I’m about to burst.
It’s kind of what happens when you raise your child to manhood. He doesn’t need his momma anymore. Well, except for home cooked meals and the occasional laundry drop off … tasks that are now embraced and performed with greater joy and love than all his younger years combined. I look at this child of mine who is now a handsome, 6’ 3” man. I wonder how could time possibly fly by so fast? How will he make it without … um … me.
I’ve cared for him. Loved him. Prayed for him. Laid down the law with him. Learned to be a real boy’s mom, as I reluctantly allowed him take more than the average risk, as most boys do. Jumping from the roof to see if he could land on his feet. Jumping his BMX bike to see how high he could fly without crashing. Rollerblading on half pipes attempting a mid air flip twenty feet in the air. It’s what boys do. And I did my best to not hover or run to his side each time he crashed. I just clinched my fists and covered my eyes. A lot. And thankfully, he always escaped major injury.
It’s the beginning of the empty nest, as his brother and sister are not far behind. It feels like my two decades of motherhood are being put to the test.
It’s the “Motherhood final exam.” Will I pass? Will he reflect what I spent two decades teaching him?
As they are growing up, their faith is really our faith. They believe in God because we believe in God. It’s not really their own. It’s their child-like faith of trusting that Momma wouldn’t steer them wrong. But at some point, their faith needs to become their own. They can either become a statistic of walking away from church and finding their own way, or they can come to the point where they truly own their own faith. They believe in the Truths of God because they truly believe it. It’s not our faith any longer. It’s their own. They own it, and they walk in it because they truly believe it, and no one can take that away from them.
Thankfully, my son clearly has come to own his own faith. Sure, I taught him, and he grew up in church, but he truly believes God loves him, and he truly loves God and what God loves because he has owned it and tested it, and it’s real to Him, as he serves the Lord with his gifts and talents.
For me, that’s one down, two to go. I pray daily for my other two children, 19 and 17 years old, to own their own faith. That they would truly feel loved by God, and learn to love what God loves most.
As a mom, there are many prayers we should pray over our children, but one of the most important prayers we should pray for our children is that they will one day own their own faith. That’s when it becomes real. That’s when they will walk boldly in their calling and purpose. That’s when their choice of their future mate will likely be the one God has set a part for them. That’s when they know where to go when their world come crashing in around them. They can always come home to Momma, but they will know that God is the One who ultimately holds them in His hands. All because, their faith truly is their own.
- Ch…ch…ch…CHANGES Are Coming in 2017 for TMI - December 27, 2016
- What New Thing Are You Ready to See God Do in Your Life in 2017? - December 26, 2016
- Heaviness and Newness - December 23, 2016
