The woman with 19 kids has been called out on the red carpet in the name of sanity, birth control, child neglect and more. Michelle rarely addresses the accusations and comparisons. Instead, she does what she knows best. She plants herself, firmly rooted in God and raises her kids….all 19 of them.
You may be asking, what does Michelle have to do with me or this study? I came here to feel encouraged about being a not so perfect mom and then you have to bring up Michelle, really?
Work with me here, little mama. Tell me, what thoughts flashed through your mind when you saw the name Michelle Duggar? Which one do you identify with?
- I can’t raise my 2 kids, let alone 19.
- What was that woman thinking?
- Hasn’t she heard of birth control?
- I’ve seen the show and turned if off, I can’t compete with that.
- Her kids are so well behaved.
- Her husband loves her so much
- How on earth does she keep that 7000 sq. ft. house clean?
- Wow, what a blessing her life has been encouraging me to be the best I can be.
I’ll venture to guess NONE of you thought of the last statement first? And this my friends is what Chapter 2 is about in No More Perfect Moms. We are comparing our lives with others, thus amplifying our flaws and insecurities becoming judgmental. Being judgmental is a dangerous slope.
What happens when we compare and come up short? We feel threatened. And Jill asks, what does it take for us to realize this is a heart issue? This is called pride and it needs to be squashed quickly or you and I will NEVER feel adequate as a mom, nor will we ever learn to embrace our real lives. Over the last couple of weeks, my eyes have been opened to how quickly I size up another woman’s life and compare. If I could just keep my eyes resting on God, reminding myself of his thoughts of me—this perfection infection would heal quickly. Learning to love ourselves as God sees us is the real antidote.
- We need to take off pride and put on humility.
- Take off fear and put on courage.
- Take of insecurity and put on confidence.
So my question for you is which one do you struggle with most?
1. Where do you struggle with pride the most – in your marriage or in
your parenting? Why?
2. Is it harder for you to be honest with yourself or honest with others? Why?
3. If you were able to read the book, can you identify a time when you jumped to conclusions and unfairly judged another mom like
Emily’s story on page 38?
4. Can you share a time where you changed your expectations (of yourself, your spouse, or your
kids) to better match reality? What results did you experience?
Can you brainstorm one practical way you can “take off” the old self
and “put on” the new self. Ask God to show you where you can practice your new way of
thinking. If you’d like, write Ephesians 4:22-24 on an index card and place it somewhere where
you can see it each day, “You were taught…to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by
its deceitful desire…and to put on the new self, created to be like God…”
For next week: Review Chapter 3′s Video: http://youtu.be/AfJuevi75j0