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FACING YOUR FEARS – 31 STORIES FROM M.O.M.
In Raising a Modern Day Princess, Pam’s book (co-author with Doreen Hanna) , moms and mentors team up to help walk young women through a rite of passage learning what it means to walk in a manner worthy of her calling—a daughter of the King of Kings—a Modern Day Princess. Mom and mentor might be seen as a winning duet helping a teen girl live the song of life God created her for.
Some of you might have grown up hearing Dick Clark play songs on American Bandstand, then ask for a rating from eager teens. If it was a song with a strong beat, it rated high. My mom [Pam’s] would get a high mother rating because she provided a beat for my life I could “dance to.” The resounding mantras of my mother’s words echo in my heart:
- Take the high road.
- Be part of the solution.
- Be a loyal friend.
- Search for God until you find Him.
- Celebrate all you can in life because life can be traumatic. Look for times and ways to mark the moments that matter.
As I look back, I recognize that my mom tried her best to mark my important moments. However it was her character that served as the musical score to my heart. As the maestro of your daughter’s life, the traits your daughter needs to see in you are:
As you live these qualities out, she learns to live out God’s song for her. In addition, a wise mom will select a mentor(s) the echo that song , or back up your words and role model of a life well lived before your daughter. So what are the traits of a good mentor?
As you and your daughter consider a woman mentor, you may identify women who you already recognize as mentors in your own life or your daughter’s. For your daughter it may be a teacher, coach, youth leader, close friend, or family member (such as an older cousin or aunt). If you don’t see a mentor in your daughter’s life at this present time, we encourage you to begin praying that God will bring one into her life.
Releasing our daughters into the care of a mentor honors her highly. It means we (mothers) trust and respect this woman and are secure in the knowledge that she is like-minded and will uphold our standards of godliness and integrity.
Following are qualities that are important in a good mentor, she becomes:
- A friend – someone who will walk alongside your daughter and who encourages, believes in and laughs with her.
- A confident counselor – trustworthy with all that is spoken to her.
- A guide/coach – assists in helping your daughter establish godly life skills in her relationship with God and others.
More specific things to consider in a mentor can be identified by this simple acrostic. A mentor is a woman who:
Makes God’s Word a priority and uses Scripture to direct your daughter, not just her personal opinion.
Encourages the development of strengths and challenges your daughter to overcome weaknesses.
Nurtures through prayer and seeks God’s direction with and for your daughter.
Tactfully confronts in love when wrong thinking or actions are evident.
Obeys God and lives so that her spiritual walk with Him is evident to and confirmed by others.
Realizes transparency and authenticity are strategic tools in mentoring. By sharing her strengths and potential weaknesses, she can help your daughter make wise decisions.
It takes a choir around a soloist to really highlight her voice; in the same way, loving adults surrounding a Modern-Day Princess will make her life SING!
Pam Farrel is a relationship specialist, author of over 35 books including bestselling Men Are Like Waffles, Women Are Like Spaghetti , 10 Best Decisions a Parent Can Make, 10 Best Decisions a Woman Can Make, Raising a Modern Day Princess and Got Teens? She is mom to three and has been married over 30 years. Free articles, resources available: www.Love-Wise.com (Connecting Love and Wisdom!)